Roughly translated (my Italian is a bit rough around the edges) the above means, "Happiness, Captured"
That's what all of the following are to me, happy moments (OK so, truth be told, the one of my dad and hubby installing the pot rack was a little scary because we are still wondering if the ceiling is going to fall down if I add another pot to the rack) in my life. Some are amusing, some are sweet, but all are happy.
Just thought I'd share them with you whilst I am desperately trying to hang onto all the wonderful things in my life and try to bring it into sharper focus, vs. the myriad things that are troubling me of late. Now if only my damned camera would do the same!
Pooh's biggest fan! Who knew?
Shhhhhh, we wouldn't want word to get out that our big orange wanna-be spider slayer has a cuddle buddy. Gracie, his sister, will never let him live it down!
The Little Imp and her BFF, Grammie.
Megawatt and one of her BFF's, Zack, before the "Last Hurrah Before College" which included two teams of five kids each on a scavenger hunt through three towns. Videos were shot with the local police singing the theme song from Cops, (note, that video is just the theme song, not the one Megawatt and friends made which I'm still trying to edit down in order to post!), convincing convenience store clerks to let them wheeze the juice and then, if that weren't enough, get them to sing and do the motions to the YMCA song made famous by the Village People.
When my mom was here she made my all-time favourite dish... FRIED CHICKEN, MASHED POTATOES and PAN GRAVY.
Mmmmmm, look at those golden breasts! I died and went to poultry heaven that night, as did several of my arteries. It was worth it! The ONLY time I ever eat it is when my mom makes it, and seeing as how she lives on the west coast and we live on the east coast, it isn't very often I get to indulge.
Several months ago I ordered this pot rack. I have moaned and groaned about wanting it hung, and procrastinated calling in a handyman - because the hubby and I are DDIY'ers....Don't Do It Yourself! I guess I just thought it was going to magically hang itself. Thankfully, my daddy came to my rescue and helped the hubby install it!
Please please please don't fall....
If the worse case scenario happens and it falls (it might because we discovered the studs in the attic were not placed in the proper places in order to brace both sides of the rack and the insulation got in the way of the anchors we had to use) we aren't too concerned as we decided to install a new ceiling when we have the granite counter tops installed because we're going to install recessed lighting as well and a ceiling fan. But still, I don't want it to fall. That would not be cool. If it fell, it would most likely happen in the middle of the night causing me to go into cardiac arrest.
THIS DID NOT MAKE ME HAPPY AND SHOULD NEVER HAVE BEEN CAPTURED!
So, Megawatt walks in this evening with this huge shit-eating grin on her face and says she has something for me. She said she wanted to give me something that would take my mind off of everything else.
She wasn't kidding.
Whatever she had for me, she was carrying around in the bag she uses as a purse. Silly me, I thought she had a kitten. I have been wanting to get another kitten, and she knows this. However, something about the way she was holding the bag, and the fact that there were no plaintive mews coming from within it's depths set my hairs on end.
Then she went and got a box. A large box. For a moment my heart skipped a beat as I thought to myself; "I bet it's just a silent little scared kitten, and she's getting a nice box prepared for it."
Yeah, I delude myself pretty often, thanks for asking.
Note the box and then how she just dumped the bag in the box. If it was a cute cuddly kitten, she would not have done that!
I look down and see something emerging from the bag and I scream. I don't mean scream I mean, I LET LOSE THE SCREAM OF ALL SCREAMS....a scream that makes horror movie screams seem like whispers in comparison!
Do you see that, that THING??!?!?
When I realized what it was, I jumped back (and for a short fat woman, that was a major feat in and of itself!) and screamed again.
Me: "MEAGHAN XXXXXX XXXXXXX WHAT THE FUCKITY FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, BRINGING ME SOMETHING LIKE THAT?"
Meg: Mom! I thought you liked them? I wanted to bring you something to keep you company when I leave.
Me: What the bloody hell made you think I like those things? Isn't the fact that whenever one is shown on TV, especially those stupid nature shows, that I have to leave the room? What the hell? I have something to keep me company when you leave, it's called a two year old, it's called a husband, it's called the Internet, it's called two cats, a dog, five million dust bunnies, a partridge in a pear tree, and if all that isn't enough, I have the creepy whistling dude who lives behind us that I can torment with more letters. I HAVE COMPANY!
What's that you say? You can't tell WHAT IT IS? Oh, OK, how about I show you in more detail what my sweet faced daughter brought home for me...
Um yeah, my thoughtful daughter brought me a SNAKE! A SERPENT! A DENIZEN OF HELL! Into my house...the house I live in. The house I sleep in every night. I do not want a goddamned snake crawling into bed with me in the middle of the night. Because, you know, that's exactly what would happen. I have that kind of luck.
Oh look, the Little Imp is interested in Megawatt's gift to mommy...
Then Megawatt pops up with a real winner;
"Mom, it might help you with your writer's block. You can keep it on a cage on your desk!"
Sure it will help me with my writer's block because I'd never go near the computer with that THING sitting on my desk, looking at me, flicking it's evil little serpent tongue at me. Writer's block? What writer's block? I would stop writing altogether and sit in the corner, rocking back and forth and drool all over myself until someone took pity on me and removed Satan's spawn my my home.
Crap, something just crawled across my foot! Oh, nevermind, it was only a lose thread from my blouse.
Megawatt, I love you kid, more than anything, but sweetie, I am depressed, not suicidal. Next time just stick with a Hallmark card...or flowers!
Flowers are good.
Or even a kitten.
