My husband, well, in a word, he's brilliant. The man thinks of everything. Here, I'll even give you a perfect example.
Last week I was cleaning out the fridge and pulled the carton of eggs out so that I could clean the shelf they were on. For some reason I happened to notice there was a "Use Before" date on the carton. Now, a certain person, who shall remain nameless, says that me noticing that this date even existed was an act of God -- there can be no other explanation for it and that I most probably would have left them in there and used them, potentially giving everyone food poisoning.
Anyhow, I have never before noticed that eggs had a "Use Before" date on the carton. Don't get me wrong, I am aware that everything eventually goes bad, and that includes things that shoot out of a chickens underside. I just never really thought about it actually applying to eggs in the fridge. Frankly I have always been of the opinion that hell, if they didn't hatch, they were good to go! And honestly, eggs really don't last that long around here. We're either baking them, scrambling them, poaching them or deviling them...and when we're really desperate we throw them at people we don't like make souffles that always fall flat, with them.
However, I honestly have never given any consideration that eggs did indeed have a shelf life. To date, not one single person has ever been made ill by my cooking. I think it's important to throw that out there.
So I stood there, looking at this carton of eggs; staring at the "Use Before" date -- the hubby says I was looking at it the way someone from 1452 might look at a cell phone, and I called to him:
Me: Hey hun, have a look at this. These eggs have a "Use Before" date on them. I have never ever noticed eggs have this. Hmmmm.
The Hubby: *mouth hanging open* You're joking me, right? Luv, of course they have a "Use Before" date. You don't think something that comes from a chicken's bum is going to last forever do you?
Me: Don't look at me like that. I know they aren't exactly Willy Wonkas Everlasting Gobstoppers. But I honestly had no idea their shelf life was so short. You know, I think I've even baked cakes and cookies with eggs that had been in the fridge a good two months.
The Hubby: *turns a grayish/green colour and shakes his head* Right, you're spot on that they have a "Use Before" date. Good thing for all of us you finally discovered this.
Me: Yeah, OK.
The next day the hubby and the Little Imp went grocery shopping and one of the things on the list was a dozen eggs. When they returned home, the Little Imp comes running in and says, rather enthusiastically, "Mumma, daddy got you sumfing good!" I couldn't help but get excited too. She was smiling from ear to ear and jumping around on one foot. Something worthy of a one-footed jump had to be awesome!
I dig into the groceries and the hubby points to these...
Me: Wow, organic, cage free eggs. We've had organic cage free eggs before though. Are these what Imp is so excited about?
The Hubby: Oh but these are special eggs. Have a look at one, luv. G'on.
I open the eggs and at first glance they appear to be ordinary, large brown eggs. I look at them again, turn one over in my hands and for the hell of it, shake it.
The Hubby: No no...here, look right here, see what it says?
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, Idiot Proof Eggs.
My husband, like I said, thinks of everything. I also think he's thinking about self-preservation in the event that I don't happen to notice the "Use Before" date on the carton, that I'll certainly notice the "Use By" date on the damn egg itself, thereby avoiding any potential food poisoning.
Such a thoughtful soul.
